There seems to be a culturally based idea, at least in my religion, which says if you live your life as a righteous member that your life will be easier. (This begs the questions: what does it mean to be a "righteous member" and what does "easier" mean, but those are different discussions.) There is this pervasive idea that if you don't do as you've been instructed, if you're not obedient to authority, that you'll have more challenges and a harder time. If and when you return to the fold your life will go back to being easy. If a person subscribes to this line of thought, it's simple to jump to the conclusion that if someone's life is hard, they must be paying for mistakes or sinning.
I'm not sure where this concept comes from, since it's certainly not accurate. If I look at it from a Biblical perspective I find Job, who was described as "perfect and upright, and one that feared God, and eschewed evil" Job 1:1. He had as many troubles as most mortals experience in a lifetime, despite being such a good guy. In my own personal experience, I live a pretty clean life as far as standards go. Yet I've had some tremendous challenges including brain damage, back surgery, near paralyzing pain for months on end, and that's just some of my physical challenges.
I think its a huge misconception that "righteous members" (whatever that means) have it easier. Mortality is just hard, regardless of your walk of life. Whether I am Christian, Buddhist, or worship little green men from space, I am not exempt from difficulties that come with having a mortal body and being on this planet. As far as religion and life choices, I believe that I choose the path I want to walk and learn what I can from it. Joining my church has surely not made my life easier, but I stick with it because it's what I want. Owning my choice and acknowledging that life is just hard, insulates me from the idea that I'm a bad person and being punished for something I've done wrong. It also keeps me from judging someone else as a sinner or judging their mistakes because their life is hard. It also prevents me from judging others to be better people than I am because to me their lives look idyllic or easy.
Judge not, that ye be not judged. For with what judgment ye judge, ye shall be judged: and with what measure ye mete, it shall be measured to you again. And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? Matt 7:1-3 (KJV)
"For thus saith the Lord: Ye shall not esteem one flesh above another, or one man shall not think himself above another;" Mosiah 23:7
One of the things that helps me when things are really difficult is to remind myself of something a friend used to say all the time. When she was stressed, she would tell herself, "It came to pass. It didn't come to stay, it came to pass." It Came To Pass is a simple little phrase that I find all over the Bible and other scriptures which I've adopted as well. It reminds me that no challenge lasts forever. No emotion, regardless of how dramatic, is permanent.
I like the idea that Christ came and atoned for my sins (and yours, and everyone else's). I don't think that every time I mess up I'm causing Him more pain, because I believe He already atoned for everything anyone has ever, or could ever do. The stuff I've already messed up is covered, and the stuff I will mess up is covered. That's the beauty of it for me, coming to feel like Jesus loves me enough to take care of all of it, even what hasn't happened yet.
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